BECAUSE HE’S ALREADY DEAD? Ex-vice President Orlock underwent a stress test, heart catheterization, and was administered virgin blood at George Washington University Hospital today. He is said to be resting comfortably and is expected to be released in a day or two. [Wash Po]
Posts Tagged ‘death’
Dick Cheney’s Fifth (!) Heart Attack Can’t Kill Him Either
Posted in Health, Sicknesses, Terrorisms, Wingnuts, tagged death, Dick Cheney, the undead on 02/23/2010 | Leave a Comment »
Posted in The End of the World, War, tagged Afghanistan, death, today in injustice, War on 02/23/2010 | Leave a Comment »
HAPPY TUESDAY: A Western airstrike of an omnibus in Afghanistan kills 27, most of them women and children. The incident is being called the worst episode of civilan casualties in Afghanistan in six months. [LA Times]
By Relief, We Meant Sort Of, But Not Really
Posted in Economy, Homelessness, The End of the World, tagged death, foreclosures, HAMP, The Treasury Dept., whoops on 02/18/2010 | Leave a Comment »
The Treasury Department released the latest figures today for its Home Affordable Modification Program – the $75 billion flagship homeowner relief program. As MoJo notes, the figures are abysmal. Through January, HAMP has resulted in roughly 116,000 permanent mortgage modifications, 76,000 offers of permanent modifications, and more than 1 million homeowners beginning trial modifications.
Simply [...]
Sure Hope You Washed The Jizz Of Your Hands Because The TSA Will Be Swabbing Them Palms In A Jiffy!
Posted in The End of the World, Traveling to the Foreigns, tagged civil liberties, death, planes, sure why not, swabbing for explosives, TSA on 02/17/2010 | Leave a Comment »
SURE WHY NOT: From CNN: “The Transportation Security Administration soon will begin randomly swabbing passengers’ hands at checkpoints and airport gates to test them for traces of explosives.” Oh man. Remember when civil liberties, privacy and personal space was a thing, once? [CNN]
Stimulus Working, But For Whom?
Posted in Economy, Lawmaking, Politicking, tagged death, doom, Economy, jesus h. christ, some package you got there, Stimulus on 02/17/2010 | Leave a Comment »
Despite the NY Times’ and Joe Biden’s claims that OF COURSE the stimulus has been successful, MoJo (thankfully) reminds us that this is only part of the picture. According to a report by the Kirwan Institute for the Study of Race and Ethnicity, many of the employment gains from the $787 billion American Reinvestment and [...]
Survey Reveals Many Men Take Off Badly Fitting Condoms During Sex; Whether These Men Realize The Condoms Cease Working After Being Thrown On The Floor Is Another Matter Altogether
Posted in Sexytime, The End of the World, tagged Africa, condom use, death, ill-fitting contraceptives, STDs, there is a Sexually Transmitted Infections Journal! on 02/16/2010 | Leave a Comment »
HERE’S YOUR LEAD: “Men are twice as likely to take the condom off midway through sex due to a poor fit, a poll of 436 men in Sexually Transmitted Infections journal reveals.”
Twice as likely to take it off, then to do what? The article doesn’t really say. (Mostly because this is [...]
Most Of America To Be Wiped Out By Heart Disease
Posted in Animals, Health, Sicknesses, TeeVee, tagged death, health and fitness, hooray, the teevee on 01/12/2010 | Leave a Comment »
BUT I GOTS TO WATCH IDOL!! A new study by a bunch of Australian researchers, found that every hour spent watching TeeVee or sitting in front of a monitor each day increases the risk of dying from heart disease by almost a fifth (!!!). By monitoring 8,800 adults for six years, scientists found that [...]
Oral Roberts Is Deader Than Hell, But Let’s Listen To Him Talk About Sex!
Posted in Religion, Sexytime, tagged death, dirty old men, gross, horror, later bro, Oral Roberts, sexytime but not really on 12/15/2009 | Leave a Comment »
Noted televangelist and Oral Roberts died of pneumonia at 91 years old today, and oh well enough about that. Let’s listen to some archaic tapes of him talking about sex, and how to get ‘er done, hetero style. “Go on…go on over there and touch it! Put your arms [...]
More Bullets Are Always the Answer
Posted in The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged bullets, death, guns guns guns!, impending murder, NObama, stocking up on 11/03/2009 | Leave a Comment »
What do you do during a period of economic crisis, job losses, and foreclosures? Buy more ammunition for your guns, of course! According to industry officials, gun owners have bought about 12 billion rounds of ammo in the past year; that’s up from the usual 7 to 10 billion in a normal year. That translates [...]
Safety Experts Fear Americans Will Just Walk Into Traffic If They Don’t Hear A ‘Vroooooom’
Posted in Lawmaking, The End of the World, tagged death, dumb things, the illusion of safety, yeah the streets aren't fucking loud enough yet on 10/14/2009 | Leave a Comment »
CHRIST ON A CRACKER: What is going on here, people? “…safety experts, worried that hybrids pose a threat if pedestrians, children and others can’t hear them approaching, want automakers to supply some digitally enhanced vroom. Indeed, just as cellphones have ring tones, “car tones” may not be far behind — an option for [...]
Unemployment Is So Happenin’ Everyone’s Doing It!
Posted in Economy, The End of the World, tagged death, the economy on 10/02/2009 | Leave a Comment »
The unemployment rate rose to 9.8 percent in September, its highest since June 1983, proving that all the positive indicators being announced every week, trying to convince people that the economy is getting better, are mostly bullshit. As Robert Reich over at Salon argues, what you need before even discussing the possibility of an economic [...]
Washington Post Hack Richard Cohen Accuses Barack Obama Of Not Bombing Iran
Posted in Media, Racisms, The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged death, fucking idiots, journalisismsm, Richard Cohen, Washington Post on 09/30/2009 | Leave a Comment »
Richard Cohen, who somehow is paid to write words (by a once-credible newspaper, no less), wants to know why President Barack Obama has yet to transform into the Angel of Death, for America. It’s a fair question.
The crux of Cohen’s general ‘argument’ is this: why isn’t the president a different human [...]
Department Of Homeland Security Issues Warning: ‘Never Leave The House’
Posted in Terrorisms, The End of the World, tagged death, doom, kingdom of fear, national 'security', The End of the World on 09/23/2009 | Leave a Comment »
Those gossip-goblins of cryptic ambiguity, the Department of Homeland Security, along with the FBI, have issued their latest security bulletins nationwide, with regards to TERRORISM.
Yes friends, I’m afraid The Terrorists will STRIKE everywhere AT ONCE, possibly! And soon! This much we know for sure.
Stadiums, arenas, hotels, subway systems, as well as [...]
The U.S Arms The World With Weapons; Probably Not Helping With The ‘Peace On Earth’ Stuff
Posted in Economy, Military, The End of the World, Traveling to the Foreigns, War, tagged cognitive dissonance, death, USA? USA? on 09/08/2009 | Leave a Comment »
SELLING A SHIT-TON OF GUNS IS GOOD FOR THE ECONOMY, AND GOOD FOR THE APOCALYPSE: It’s a win-win: “The United States signed weapons agreements valued at $37.8 billion in 2008, or 68.4 percent of all business in the global arms bazaar, up significantly from American sales of $25.4 billion the year before.”
Just think [...]
Wearing Flip-Flops Will Kill You, Maybe
Posted in Health, Sicknesses, The End of the World, tagged death, feet are gross, flip flops on 08/11/2009 | Leave a Comment »
They only harbor a mere 18,100 strains of bacteria, including some possibly deadly strains of staph.
Hm. Can’t we just give all the infectious diseases to people who wear Crocs?? [NY Daily News]
Hemingway Was Wrong: The World Is Not A Fine Place, And It Is Not Worth Fighting For
Posted in Terrorisms, The End of the World, Traveling to the Foreigns, War, World News, tagged China, death, doom, Uighurs on 07/29/2009 | Leave a Comment »
DID CHINA ‘DISAPPEAR’ 10,000 OF IT’S UIGHUR POPULATION? Exiled Uighur leader Rebiya Kadeer believes Chinese police opened fire in the Muslim region of Xinjiang on July 5th, after dark, killing thousands, and she has called out the United States for its tepid response to the regional violence. [Yahoo News]
Fox Alert: Audiences Can Now Text Hit Lists; Kill
Posted in TeeVee, tagged death, Fox News, Geraldo on 06/30/2009 | 1 Comment »
Last night, on Faux News (see what I did there?), TeeVee personalities Geraldo Rivera and Bill O’Reilly recommended the murder of David Earls, a convicted child-rapist who was sentenced to a ridiculous one-year term for his crime.
Because the problem isn’t our criminal justice system, but the fact that we cannot openly murder certain undesirables, [...]
More Headlines: Trains And Cars Also Racist
Posted in Colleges, Economy, Education, Military, Terrorisms, The End of the World, Traveling to the Foreigns, War, World News, tagged death, Economy, student loans on 06/30/2009 | Leave a Comment »
• A freight train derailed and exploded in Northern Italy, killing at least 12 and injuring 50. [Talking Points Memo]. Oh and a car bomb hits NATO-supplying trucks in Pakistan, killing four. [NY Times]
• As the U.S. begins its troop withdrawal from Iraq, the country is expected to start a much-heralded auction of licenses to develop [...]
Best Article On The Dying Republican Party You’ll Read All Week
Posted in Politicking, tagged death, politics on 05/07/2009 | Leave a Comment »
FEATURING SUCH CLASSICS AS: “The Washington critiques of the Republican Party as powerless, leaderless and rudderless — the new Donner party — are not very illuminating. Minority parties always look weak and inept in the penalty box. Sure, it can be comical to watch Republican National Committee (RNC) gaffe machine Michael Steele riff on his [...]
